Disruptive Paper Clip

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Text was found in 15 images. Automatically transcribing text…


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ANOMALOUS ITEM "DISRUPTIVE PAPER CLIP"
CLASS & DESIGNATION PENDING
UNABLE TO DEVISE
CONTAINMENT
PROCEDURES


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FOUND IN MY CLOSET. TEMP 76°F
UNABLE TO ASSESS CORRECT USE OF SOME
OBJECTS. BOWL IS ONLY KNOWN
[Illegible]
HOUSE, WHICH IS LIKELY [Illegible]
BUT I CAN'T THINK OF AN ALTERN
ATIVE.


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LOST THE
CLIP. EFFECTS
PERSIST. CAN'T
FIND ANYTHING
STICKY ENOUGH
TO PICK IT
UP ANYWAYS


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TRIAL & ERROR SUGGESTS
FOOD IS EDIBLE % MOSTLY
IN FRIDGE.

UNSURE OF CAT'S
UTILITY. PEST?


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[No text detected.]


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[Illegible]
NUTRI VET.

Hairball
Illegible
REGULAR USE MAY HELP
& ELIMINATE HAIRBALLS

CHICKEN
FLAVOR GEL
NET WT. 3 OZ (89 mL)

WIFE HOME AT 6.
3:89 CURRENTLY.
TOO TIRED TO
DEVISE ALTERNATIVE
BLOOD SOURCE.


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INFURIATED. FEEL LIKE AN
ALIEN IN HOSTILE ENVIRONS.
I REMEMBER UNDERSTANDING
THE WORLD, EVERY RESPONSE
FEELS INSUFFICIENT.

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MAYBE I'M NOT
TRYING HARD
ENOUGH.
PROBABLY MY
FAULT SOMEHOW.


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FOUND
IT!

elite

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END OF
BOWL ONE


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SORRY FOR BAD
HANDWRITING.
COULDN'T FIND
BOWL FLATTENER.


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[Text is obscured or cut off. Transcription may be inaccurate.]
FACTS
N'T MOVE IN
NE OF SIGHT
METALLIC
E APPEARANCE
OTOS & REALLI


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STILL 3:89
EITHER BROKEN
OR
NOT
A
CLOCK


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IT WOULD BE EASIER IF
I WAS TOTALLY USELESS.
THEN I
COULD CURL UP & WAIT
FOR HELP. BUT I CAN
WRITE & USE MY PHONE
SO I HAVE TO TRY.


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WHAT A CRUEL JOKE.


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HOPEFULLY, THIS WILL SUFFICE.


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